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Presidential Election 2016 Should Be Decided by a Fart Contest

Posted on - Tuesday, June 21, 2016 under General Presidential Election 2016 Should Be Decided by a Fart Contest

Enough With Old School Politics……Let’s Bust Out One of the Greatest Non-Deadly Forms of Presidential Dueling
Was that a “squeaker?” Oh, wait, that one sounded like a bulldozer backfiring. Whew! That last one definitely left a mark.

Surely Fox News, CNN, or some other network can come up with a reality show to help us choose our next President. After all, the whole election process has turned in to TMZ on steroids.

Why not use a fart contest to draw America in for ratings sake? Can’t you hear that “movie preview guy” doing the commercials leading up to the contest?

“This Friday……..Tune In to Must See TV………When Hillary Clinton Faces Off Against Donald Trump……..Not to Spew Verbal Diarrhea………..But to Hike Their Legs in a Rip-Roaring Fart Contest……..Who Will Be Left Standing When the Methane Dissipates?”

There is no truer gauge for electing the President in this election. Half of America thinks Hillary Clinton is more evil than the Devil Who Wore Prada. The other half of Americans think Donald Trump is as qualified as Dr. Evil from Austin Powers. And God forbid if either Clinton or Trump have a Mini-Me.

The great equalizer is flatulence. Every American (including your grandmother) lets one fly every once in a while. Why not hold the presidential candidates accountable for their au natural states? Only then can we, as Americans, decide who to elect as our next leader.

Just my thoughts……

Thanks,

Cade Parian